A Deeper Look at The Golden Rule

Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.
Matthew 7:12

Doing to others what they would do to you takes two wise acts of imagination, one massive act of self renunciation, one beautiful act of joyful generosity.
1 - Get inside their experience and have some creative empathy.
2 - Stay you and try to imagine what you, as God has taught you in the Bible, would be needed here.
3 - That’s impossible without a massive act of self renunciation.
4 - Do it as a joyful act of generosity.

... If you stop at the 1st step without moving on to the 2nd step, you aren’t loving them yet.  Because if you just say I’m gonna get inside and be them, well, the problem is, they may not know what they need.  They may be so in agony they don’t even know what they really want.  So you can’t just get inside them and just do what they want.  You have to get inside they and still be you.  The Bible saturated, humble, God shaped you, with a creative act of empathy getting in their life, and their skin, and their feelings, being both them and you and out of that, discerning what is wanted and needed here at the deepest level, and that’s what you do.

- John Piper

Serving and ministering to others isn’t merely letting them tell you what they want.  It’s not merely seeing a need and filling it.  It’s seeing the need and discerning more fully what should be done about it.  It requires that you stand apart and decide between yourself and God what He wants you to do in the situation, not what others are telling you should be done, not what looks like should be done, nor even what others are pressuring you to do.  All that matters is that you do as God leads and commands you.  That's what's important and that's what's key.